Tuesday, March 12, 2013

If I Were Pope

I'm still waiting for my invite to the Papal Enclave at the Sistine Chapel. Since I decided not to renew my real estate license, I thought running for Pope would be a good fit for my skillset. I'd have to brush up on my Latin, but hey.

Anyway, today begins the Top Ten things I'd do if I were Pope.

Number Ten: Declare International Bacon Day. This suggestion came from my daughter, whose daughter status, I realize, may be challenged by these guys:

But as most anthropologists will tell you, the sharing of food is a major step to warring tribes negotiating peace. Sharing bacon with those who don't know about it and therefore hate us is a first step to peace.

1 comment:

  1. I support your papacy. Even you can't get them to go for evolution and gay marriage, at least we'll have the bacon so it can't be all bad.